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Donald is going professional this year and is 'signing off' on November 1st so the DWP won't be on his back this year. The brown envelopes we got from the benefit people last year had to be seen to be believed. They refused to believe that we could mount such an extravanza without getting a few quid out of it. They told Donald he hadn't been available for work while the Fank was on but as he pointed out nor was anyone else in the Highlands and Islands at that time.
We are measuring up the site on the first week in November and may call a meeting in Stornoway to elect a Steering Committee - I believe Godwin is an great advocate of Steering Committees!
We are going to take soil samples on the Fank site as we believe that toxic chemicals from the sheep dip may have permeated the peat over the years - we understand this pollution may be responsible for the high concentration of unmarried, unsuitable, unattractive woman born close to the site.
Annie Beag has promised to come out of retirement and is busy knitting suitable fank attire so she wont be caught out in the fashion stakes this time round. Watch this space and bless you all.