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Update #5 Profile of Adam

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Christa | 14:25 UK time, Wednesday, 2 February 2011

Christa's Drawing of Adam

Christa has posted a profile of Adam.

Ok Adam, if you insist on being a complete sod, I'm going to profile you.

NAME Adam Jacobs

APPEARANCE Dead eyed. Waxy. If he didn't move you'd think he was one of those bodies they practice on at medical school. And how can he have the gall to criticise my hair? His hairstyle looks like his entire scalp has time travelled from 1974. Or from one of those yellow sun bleached photos in the windows of really old barber's shops. In Poland.

ATTITUDE Cocky gutter-mouthed sex pest. He has all the charm of a genital wart and is so sexist he'd make Gene Hunt feel bashful.

SOCIAL CIRCLE Outcast. I mean he talks about having other friends, but strangely I never see him with anyone but us. I wonder why? Oh, I know. See above.

And he talks about this other group of supernaturals he's met, who strangely he doesn't see anymore. Almost as if he was so damn annoying that they couldn't take it anymore and threw him out, screaming until their ears bled. That's how I picture it anyway.

REASON FOR SUSPICION He's a forty six year old blood addicted monster pretending to be a school boy. No, nothing suspicious to see here. Move along.

OTHER COMMENTS As for the age old antagonism between our two 'groups'. Can I just clarify one thing. I am not part of any 'group'. Not emo, not goth and not anything else. I am in a group of one. Me.

The only other subset that you could argue I am part of is teenage girls. And we traditionally do have a big problem with his group. And by 'his group', I am talking of course, about dirty old men.

I mean seriously, he's forty six! If he looked his age, everyone would assume he was there to pick up his kids, not do double geography. But instead he wanders around school using slang that hasn't been in fashion for at least ten years letching at all the girls. Even if he wasn't at risk of accidentally giving in to his bloodlust and ripping out their throats it would be wrong in so many ways.

I mean the other day he said "Whassup" for God's sake. It's just not right.

And as for the constant talking about sex, I think it's just the old, old story of the hollowest vessels making the most noise. The boy that talks about sex the most is always the one with the least experience. Adam talks about it so much, he must have actually had negative amounts of sex. He's actually overdrawn at the virgin bank. He needs to have loads of sex just to get back to zero. And can I just state here for the record: I am not going to help him. The mere idea of sleeping with him makes me want to seriously self-harm. After seriously harming him.

And before you give me that 'methink the lady doth protest too much' line, or whatever the real quote is, sometimes people are protesting against things simply because they really really dislike the idea. Sometimes it really is that simple. And that would be me in this situation. Seriously. Even getting close to thinking about it makes me want to puke until I throw up my own spine. And then I would take my own spine and strangle Adam with it.

And somehow he'd still read that as me playing hard to get.

Comments

  • Comment number 1.

    LOL Love it.

    "He's actually overdrawn at the virgin bank."

    Favourite line.

  • Comment number 2.

    Hey wait, I say "Whassup" all the time! I guess I'm officially a square/geek/nerd/old fart *SOB*

  • Comment number 3.

    Hahaa love it, that is better that Adam's profile of her!
    "so sexist he'd make Gene Hunt feel bashful"
    "And by 'his group', I am talking of course, about dirty old men"
    "actually overdrawn at the virgin bank"
    brilliant :D

  • Comment number 4.

    Cant you just feel the love :D

  • Comment number 5.

    Fantastic :-D
    Cant wait for the next episode :-)

  • Comment number 6.

    Loving the drawing XD Think Christa is my favorite character...

  • Comment number 7.

    LOL Cutting remarks from the she-wolf! ;) Heehee, she and Adam certainly do have a lot in common, not least their scathing wit. Perfect foils for each other.

    Christa is in deep denial of her werewolf status isn't she? Not once does she mention it or even allude to it. Someone mentioned in the comments of the previous entry that she's seemingly at the stage George was when we first met him. I hope Adam can help her without annoying her into murdering him. Heehee.

    Speaking of murder, I wonder if Matt was actually murdered at all. He strikes me as a suicide case and not murder as Adam assumed. His memories end with being sick but had he died accidentally in the toilet stall, his body would have been found, surely. Perhaps the eggs are relevant, the foodstuff he sought solace in when Curtis and co. were bullying him, and he ate some before he died? Would he, as a suicide, have felt so guilty/angry/vengeful/other at the time that its prevented him getting a door?

    KC

  • Comment number 8.

    Ah good so he has explained everything or did Christa just pick up his age from his lingo and the fact that he's a vampire.

  • Comment number 9.

    Hmm, I don't think I trust you Christa.

  • Comment number 10.

    From the start when first introduced in BH Adam and his story has been toooo.. funny for words, bring on BH ep3 and BCH ep2. Loving the humour and gen loving it all!!

  • Comment number 11.

    Hahaha, this is fantastic! :D Much prefered this to Adam's profile on Christa! :)

    "...and is so sexist he'd make Gene Hunt feel bashful...."
    She mentioned the Gene Genie - I think my inner fangirl just died of happiness! ;)

  • Comment number 12.

    Haha this is so funny and balances out the scores between the two
    Does anyone know if there's going to be another transformation episode?

  • Comment number 13.

    I love the drawing, really.

    11. I thought I was the only one who called him that :)

  • Comment number 14.

    You go to admit the drawing is pretty close to the real thing

  • Comment number 15.

    Well It seems I missed a lot.

    now I'm caught up.

    I love the fact we can see the characters in the profiles and the difference in relationships.

    Mitchell and George were both crying out for someone to connect to however this is clearly not Christa.

    A lot of the leave me alone vibe and the disgust towards Adam - some of it could be projection after al he keeps calling her out on her condition something she wants to hide.
    Adam however also wants to be left alone - Yes he is hoping to meet good people to keep him on the straight and narrow but as he said in the opening monologue.

    "First I've got to go back to school"

    He is hoping not to have to rely on Kids as he would see them.

    the flies are a fun touch considering his comments to Mitchell in Adam's Family.

    It is clear they both see each other as less than they can be Adam sees a teenage girl she sees a dirty old man

    Now Her accepting he's a vampire is one thing that says she knows what's going on. After all someone says to you "I'm a vampire" your not really going to believe them unless you have a very good reason.

    However the line that says she's got his number most is not the Gene hunt line apt and Awesome as it may be it's at the end

    somehow he'd still read that as me playing hard to get.

    She has definitely met a few Adams before.

  • Comment number 16.

    Methinks the lady doth protest too much, eh Adam? You're in there for sure.

  • Comment number 17.

    OK. I may not be the show's target demographic as I actually understood all of Adam's ancient cultural references, but I have to say I laughed like a drain at this. Writer=Genius.

  • Comment number 18.

    oooooh BITCHY lol must be the she-wolf in her must admit im loving these guys.
    ok so it was'nt what Mitchell meant but i think Christa can handle Adam lol

  • Comment number 19.

    Am I the only one who thinks that Matt will get loads more confidence before this ends?

  • Comment number 20.

    I'm not sure if anyone has asked this yet the thing is I don't remember reading it so here is a real question.

    Where's Matt's body?

    I think on writing it down it may have been asked before but still Where is it.if team supernatural find the body will they look around first or just call the police.

    Adam has been around Death at least twice His Mum and Dad as well as him self that makes thrice. We have to guess that Christa getting scared wasn't pleasant either. Matt is already dead so looking at a week decayed body however might prove a little awkward.

  • Comment number 21.

    ahh, they make the perfect couple.

    Very funny read.

  • Comment number 22.

    Forgive me if this has already been said and answered but does anyone know if they are going to do an Adam's prequel and a Christa's prequel as they did with the BH main characters. Would be great to know how and who made him a vampire also how it happened that he drank from his Dad instead of just ripping his throat out?! I guess we will find out what happened to Matt as this is part of the story.

  • Comment number 23.

    I mean the other day he said "Whassup" for God's sake. It's just not right.

    This is refreshing. On Becoming Human, someone who died in the 1970s uses more recent slang, and another character calls him out on it. On the North American Being Human, someone who died in the 1980s uses more recent slang, and no one notices or cares.

    I like to think if the ghost of Sir Winston Churchill asked who was dizown with his bromance, someone would call foul.

  • Comment number 24.

    So, where does this fit in with the Being Human timeline? I thought it was supposed to be roughly parallel, until I read Christa's comment that "he talks about this other group of supernaturals he's met, who strangely he doesn't see anymore"

  • Comment number 25.

    The time line it has been stated is set paralleled to the being human time line.

    The episodes in being human this season seem to be moving at a more day by day speed after all Barry is a new location so all the dangers and locations people threats and allies are going to have to be sorted out.

    Also it has been stated this is a parallel story line.

  • Comment number 26.

    This is great, and Adam better not doth protest too much with his picture because it is awesome. And i thought that Christa hadn't turned yet, and that was why she was trying to force the idea outside her head. Or really not know what Adam was going on about. Maybe she thought the scars were ugly and a confidence knock instead of a wolf turner...? Probably wrong, you guys know more than me.

    BH team make this so awesome, i love both. And it is so believeable, although i don't get all the period slang and references, i figure out most and laugh at the rest because i know what he is getting at.

  • Comment number 27.

    The only unbelieveable thing is that in sixth form Adam DECIDED to take maths. And geography. Of his own accord. No bullet to his head or anything. Shocker.

  • Comment number 28.

    Do vampires smell to werewolves?

    Adam clearly believes in staying clean his comments to Mitchell.

    So are the flies there because vampires smell bad to werewolves?

  • Comment number 29.

    Christa has a point. It's kinda pervy to have a 46 year old man hanging around HS trying to get it on with teenage girls. And he does have a negative in the virgin bank, poor thing.

    BHP are so witty with the writing. LOVE IT

  • Comment number 30.

    Adam is not a 46 year old man he's an eternal teenager so what do you expect? consider the torment of being trapped inside an adolescent body forever...never being able to properly go through the transition to manhood, 46 years of teenage anxieties (or 31 if he includes his pre vamp years) i think there would be a lot of pent up sexual frustration there. the characterization of Adam is perfect.

  • Comment number 31.

    Yep, she clearly wants Adam...

  • Comment number 32.

    Oh I'm so in love with him, it must be a vampire thing I have. In love with Mitchell too. Adore Adam's cockiness. He's gorrrrgeous

  • Comment number 33.

    I am so late to all this - and obviously reading the blogs out of order. xD
    But I have to say, I laughed so hard at this! The people in the room with me think I'm nuts. lol

    I can't wait to see how this series goes. Episode one was fab!

  • Comment number 34.

    Yes ewan, refering to number 28. I was wondering whether vampires smell to werewolves too, i would expect it because werewolves can smell everything else but in the chase scene of episode 2 George went the wrong way. I just couldn't figure out why he went the wrong way if so. I mean, i cannot use a map to save my life but if i could smell a vampire, i would definitly be able to chase him, or at least the scent of blood and sweat on Adam.

    By the way. Nothing against Adam. He is awesome.

  • Comment number 35.

    I think Adam is GEORGOUS... xxx Like Mitchell. xx

  • Comment number 36.

    Makes me laugh, how she is clearly in love with him. Christa+Adam i mean. and 35 totally agree. although Matt clearly LOVES Christa! Love Triangle:) cant wait for Sunday!

  • Comment number 37.

    The picture actually looks like him! xD

  • Comment number 38.

    Loving the reference to Gene Hunt. Ahh Life on Mars and Ashes to Ashes how i miss you =[. On the Brightside Being Human and now Becoming Human there to keep me entertained x

  • Comment number 39.

    ha lol, its funny how she takes the mic out of him but i think theres more to it, you never know, she could "like" him lolz

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