´óÏó´«Ã½

How did Australia view the England team in the One Day Internationals?

Although what I thought was angina turned out to be indigestion and that brain tumour was in fact eye-strain, I can't get in to see my GP about what appears to be leprosy due to the surgery being overrun with what?

What goes with weary granddads?

Who are the worst 'Casualty' plot-spoilers?

The real reason why the NHS is so heavily in debt?

Why are all my pills in garish colours and are clashing with my new bathroom suite?

Why are instructions with my tablets in such big letters?

In a drive to cut death rates, junior doctors are to be replaced with what?

OK, who ram-raided our local surgery with an electric wheelchair?

Describe the worst coach journey imaginable?

Why is 'Gray's Anatomy' always out at our local library?

Why has our doctor got so many friends on Facebook?

Due to perfect summer breeding conditions what is the country braced to be overrun with this winter?

Why a substantial increase in pensions is necessary?

Why can I never get through to my surgery when I've got an owie?

What are most dating sites full of?

"I put my coat on before I went out, I didn't feel the benefit and look what happened to me!"

Who are the real target audience for M & Ms?

No matter how bad you feel, who is always more unwell?

Enough to make one feel quite ill.

Zimmer frames with built-in pill dispensers are to be introduced following intensive campaigning by which marginalised group?

Who complains that, in their day, you could leave your jaws unlocked?

What are cemeteries full of?

Who tells you: "In our day, we had to make our own ailment"?

This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the house rules. Explain.

Statistically, who are least likely to provide you with an imminent inheritance?

What do hypochondriac mothers become?

the bbc were accused of ageism after calling all female newsreaders over 30 ........?

What do"The Weakest Link","Watchdog" and "The Paul O'Grady Show" have in common?

I decided that the better option was to travel in the train carriage full of drunken party-goers , it was a lot quieter and nicer than the one full of .........

Who has knitting pins and needles?

This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the house rules. Explain.

Which gangs are the most vicious when denied an age discount at the early bird special?

Who's cured by a slice of Battenburg, a nice cup of tea and Paul O'Grady on the gogglebox?

Latest shocker in the Anna Nicole case?

The Bangles' reunion tour?

Usually not featured as the 'partner' in Viagra commercials?

Who theatrically slap down their Daily Mail and mutter incredulously about respect for elders when you politely point out they're sitting in your pre-booked train seat?

What are excited CHONDRIAC GRANNIES known as ?

Who is renowned for lethal force with a pill bottle filled handbag?

Who make up 90% of the Simon Cowell fan club?

A collection of two or more what constitutes discussuions of ailments and procedures that will make your toes curl?

A collection of two or more what constitutes discussions of ailments and procedures that will make your toes curl?

(one 'u' too many)

Why does your mother think your children would be best off marrying a pharmacist?

What expression does the ´óÏó´«Ã½ Pronounciation dept guide as 'hippo-conned-Iraq grand-knees'?

Who would feel a whole lot better if they didn't boil their vegetables to mush in saltwater?

Go ahead, mess with her tea cosy and make her day?

Who makes you listen to the disclaimers following drugs adverts?

Who will rubbish the culture of the sixties as they are reaching for their collection of tiny bottles?

The latest genetically-modified sick apples?

They were giving out free samples at the clinic, but why did I get trampled trying to get one?

Who pulled rank on me and me stand at the back at the flu jab clinic?

What did one health official describe as "the wrong kind of patients"?

Mint imperials, crocheted doilies, a Stannah stairlift and bottle upon bottle of tablets. Well David, who lives in a house like this?

La Milady Imaginaire?

111? No, I'm just ill.

What does the Staffordshire man's metal detector normally pick up?

What do you call the people who are sick of the goings-on at Strictly Come Dancing?

The rel reson






who is campaigning for an all-night pharmacy next to the bingo hall

According to Wikipedia, HYPOCHONDRIAC GRANNIIES has been on the edge of the Welsh version of the one-pound coin since 1997.

´óÏó´«Ã½ News is actively recruiting female newsreaders over the age of 50, who need not apply?

Fiercest critics of the five second rule?

Who is always in front of you in the queue at the Post Office?

Neil Diamond's greatest fans?

Statistically speaking, which part of the population are most likely to complain about being simultaneously old, unwell and female?

What's a knot, when the knot not's right?

When Ma'a Ma always feels below Pa?

When Ma's Ma always feels below Pa?

If you always wind the teacher up at med-school, what demographic are you stuck treating for the rest of your life?

That Dear old Mrs Smith has a lot to answer for !

What anagram of "Gordon:Piracy Enchains!" is being used as the code-name of the new "anti-piracy bill" ?

Mark.

ITV censors revealed?

What are the Sugababes going to change their name to when they have made their 10,000th line up change?

What did the group of boffins call their new genetically engineered bred of apple specifically designed to contradict the popular phrase?

Which group think that they run the country?

Who are the targets of Speed bumps installed by Islington Council in North London?

After listening to his rant at the UN earlier this week, Colonel Gadaffi's private surgeon has recommended he spend a week in the company of a load of.................???