大象传媒

I ordered sushi, not poochy

I see you've made a right dog's dinner out of this

Cur-ry curry

Anybody fancy a hand of cards after lunch?

I don't think I'm going to Winalot with this week's caption competition

I suppose it would be rude to ask for a doggy bag?

A Vietnamese restaurant's food preparation area

Waiter, waiter! There鈥檚 no flies in my soup!

Dogs might be mans best friend but who walked off with the can opener?

After Fifteen, Jamie opens his first K-nine restaurant

Still savouring the fresh tang of the meat, Rover paused to wonder why Chow the Pekinese hadn't shown up.

In a recent survey 3 out of 4 dogs said they preferred the other choice

Amuse-pooch

Battered-fish Dogs' Home

'Who's been eating my dinner?'

I say, I really like this Afghan cuisine

Gordon was laying on this spread for his in-laws, so I guess we're all winners.

I hate this Cantonese food - I said we should have gone Pekinese

I would complain about the missing can-opener, however the lack of opposable thumbs makes that a little pointless!

His Masterchef Voice

The flowers are very nouvelle cuisine, but give me a good old fashioned tree any day!

"No Marjorie! Stop feeding the human titbits! He'll end up looking like that big old 70s unit, Schnorbitz, if you're not careful!"

鈥淚 see Bert鈥檚 knives and forks and stuff are all very neat鈥�
鈥淲ell, he is a Setter..鈥�

I hear Michael Winner rates restaurants on more or less the same criteria, quality of food, ambiance and, of course, the tummy rub.

鈥淗mmn, this is beef. I鈥檓 more of a sheepdog myself..鈥�

Hunt?! Are you kidding?

What's that Lassie? There was a pattern on that dish when we started? You are a card...
(If he says that one more time, I'm getting him a one way ticket to Hanoi!)

Shepherd's pie, again?!

Alright, which one of you mutts has a Swiss army knife?

鈥淚 see Bert鈥檚 first to finish his grub, again鈥�
鈥淲ell he is a dachshund..鈥�

"Told you we should've gone to Wag-our-buma's. Lassie & Benji's has really gone to the dogs."

Chef was a bit skimpy on the beef I thought.

K-9FC, paw lickin' good.

Which fork was I supposed to use?

Dog day afternoon (tea)

The first pop-up doggy diner in London runs into financial trouble after the owners forget that dogs don't carry money

What, no brown sauce?!

The food is so good here, AND there's a lamp-post right outside

Please, sir, I want more...

The Top Chef Quuick Fire Challenge was going to be hard to judge.

Heads I pay tails you pay

What do you tip for a tummy rub?

OK, who's got a canis-opener?

Or you can opt for the paw buffet

Rover's table manners are appalling - he didn't burp once

Best of Greed

And all this time i thought your chum was a pedigree

Have you tried the milk-bone? It's spectacular here.

If Jamie Oliver's restaurant is called fifteen, then the IV must be four

Heinz 57 varieties

A novel way of saving on the washing up at the local restaurant

What's that, Lassie? Gordon Ramsay is stuck in a burning kitchen? OK, we'll go and rescue him after we've finished these four courses.

How do I like my steak? Rare! Shocker that, I know.

This place was highly recommended in the Bitchelin Guide

He did say there were plates of meat on the table?

The Father-in-Law did not like it and so had to go. Now Gordon Ramsey could put his plans into action for expanding his customer base.

Rex's empty place served as a stark reminder to be a good boy.

So remember - a dog is not just for Christmas ... but, happily, a turkey is

I adore the menu here - it's scratch and sniff

Gourmet or gourmand? How quaint.

Just be happy we aren't on the menu, boys.

That "Something scraped off a pavement" tasted great

If I'd wanted it off-the-bone, I would have said that

At the Bulldogian club renunion, Cameron was distressed to find that their meal had been brought in line with current students' expectations. Boris and Clegg didn't seem to mind

Dinner chez Jonathan Ross.

Don't get all sniffy about the food, now

Not only can we not pay the blll, but we can't even wash up

I hear the next restaurant will be opened in Barking, but it's only for WAGs.

The Bridge Caf茅? Lord Sugar certainly knows how to choose top-class restaurants.

But, if I use my knife and fork, I fall flat onto the table

Eat up - there are benefit claimants who'd be grateful for what you've got on your plate

No tongues, please

Gordon (setter) Bleu

Hey, these are willow-pattern plates - maybe we shouldn't have licked so hard

Waitress quits after the umpteenth 'good girrrl!' accompanied by rough hair-messing from diners' owners instead of a tip.

I can recommend the cutlet of postman

Chow time!

So, Diner's Club is OK, but you don't accept Kennel Club cards?

Who ordered sau-sa-ges ?

This place? Found it in my Ruff Guide.

If the waiter wants a tip, he'll have to beg for it

Hey, who wrote this menu? A poodle?

The Puddles list here is excellent - they do a Muddy Pothole that's better than anything I've drunk on the Common.

Anybody want some whine?

It's a Mongrelian restaurant.

大象传媒 deny dumbing down as new Masterchef judges revealed.

I don't know about you but I find the cutlery on the table a sick joke.

Dine Boy!

Plenty of WAGs around the England football team's dining table then...

Painting titled 鈥楢fter Losing at Poker to That Bastard St Bernard AGAIN鈥� By CM Coolidge.

There was embarassment all round as the real Masterchef judges were uncovered.

The test to be the next Blue Peter dog was tougher than expected.

Galton Blackiston's recipe for mango sorbet with marinated paw-paw proved to be a popular choice...

Waiter, can we see the whine list please.

Painting titled 鈥楢fter Losing at Poker to That Pesky St Bernard AGAIN鈥� By CM Coolidge.

Just popped out for a bite.

Ahhh... mini sausage rolls in fido pastry. Always a winner.

How much is that doggy bag in the window?

Lemon cur?

"This should be good - I heard they were serving Korean..."