大象传媒

"What a beach," he thought.

I'm Sandy to my mates.

Must hurry, only seven hours until high tide.

Now nobody would know about Mummy's embarrassing accident...

Hazards of Speedo watching #23

With a bit more shovelling Timmy was sure he could go on the orphans picnic this weekend.

A young Brian Cox starts to count the number of grains of sand in the Universe.

Does my Mum look big in this?

Shirley stayed on the beach with her son whilst the rest of the family went off to search for her other leg

鈥淲hat do you want to be when you grow up son?鈥� asked Mrs Hare

Bored of making sand castles, he decided to embark upon making a sand person

Vote "Yes" to AV or I keep digging

2012 Beach Volleyball pitch sabotaged by tourists.

And the man with the funny hair that asked you to dig there for the "real birth certificate"...HOW much did he pay you?

Are you sure you can make me look like Pamela Anderson?

Gloria just knew she was going to be constipated later

Mum, I heard dad say to uncle Frank 'wouldn't it just be easier to just refloat her rather than bury her on the beach.' What did he mean?

After Harry had chopped off his mother's leg (to left of photograph), he decided he ought to try and cover up his crime

With his school report due to arrive any day now, this was the week to bury bad news, thought little Johnny..

After locals filled in the pothole with sand, one council worker sets about digging it back up again

Sheila just knew Mrs Stebbings would start complaining about the state of the beds in her B&B tonight

And that's for forgetting to pack my trousers.

There's more than one way to get a gagging order.

Unfortunately, Harry's Mum had no idea her son had put concrete mix in with the sand

Worried Brighton residents say ASBOs are not working.

Pyramid building gets off to bad start as architect reads the instructions backwards

Harry attempts to make his mum into a sandstone statue

Billy had obviously misunderstood the mean lady's request to 'pack sand'.

What do I think of the location and quality of the beach? - Itsandy

Work starts early on Qatar's World Cup Final pitch.

Unfortunately, Gloria never heard her elder son's reversing the tipper truck up behind her ...

I am the Exfoliator, prepare yourself!

Fern Britton's audition for the next Bond girl had gone as well as expected.

After hearing about his mum burying her head in the sand, Johnny decides to help her with the rest

Young prince William wasn't too fond of his step mother...

There was no use fighting it, little Johnny's sun and sugar cocktail was too strong, she'd seen how quickly he'd dispatched the Easter Bunny.

Sand Witch

MUM what do the Donkeys get for their lunch?

Half an hour like everyone else

Hopefully, Bournemouth's new surfing reef would be more successful than the last.

Wait until she finds out it has quick drying cement in it.....

Benny makes the archeological find of the century - the long lost Dorset beach

And now Harry had the pick all ready

"And for this trick, I'm going to make this lovely lady from the audience disappear."

"Johnny, are you sure the wedding procession is going to come along here?"

I'm not sure this is such a good idea son, daddy's still looking for where you buried granny.

Having reshaped his Mum's rear, future cosmetic surgeon Harry had now found the receptacles to improve her bust too

Sticking with his calling-card, soon there would be a beach full of right feet.

Harry had slipped a crab into this spade-load, just to see whether his Mum would become a nudist

Try as they would thet just couldn't dig her and her water ski's out of the sand......

"No, son, just my head.. and only until the AV vote is over."

Little Jack thought his mum was a bit like a hot air ballon so he decided to give her some ballast.

Hurry the donkey's sinking in the quicksand

Being covered in sand from the Jurassic Coast was about to make Diana Sore

After that burger with extra onions for lunch, Gloria was about to show the other occupants of the beach a little sand fountain

These deck-chair attendants can be so persistent

SandBack Services

For his age Sam was rather good at the sand sculptures.

Prince Charles had ambition, even at a young age

Sally wouldn't have minded so much if it had been her kid

they were sleeping out overnight for the royal wedding but surely the end of the queue was too far to see the procession

It was the first time Richard had chatted up a girl on the beach

Susan had always wondered what had happened to her husband's first three wives

French tourists visit UK where they can still be covered by a burkat and spade

It took Harry half-a-ton of sand before his mother agreed to get him an ice-cream

Little Johnny was determined to make this the best bike-park ever...

In his quest to find camelot Johnny could only find a lot of Carmel

Sally idly wondered which of the tents was Nigella's swimsuit

Unlike her husband (to left of photo), at least Sally was being buried feet-first

"But mummy - daddy said the Royal Wedding was a good day to bury bad news..."

Little Robert was so proud that he had found the golden hind

The crime-scene tents littering the beach were an ominous warning for Sally, if only she were paying attention.

The Sands of Evil Jimmo

"Tax planning and trust funds are all well and good" she thought "but maybe Damien was bit young to be told about how inheritance works....."

Shirley didn't mind the sand, but was finding Harry's left leg a bit uncomfortable

Unfortunately for Johnny's mum, the Air/Sea rescue team had all gone down to some posh do in London, that day.

"Well, we had to bring something to keep the kid entertained while we sit outside Westminster Abbey...why not a whole heap of sand?"

Poor jenny was convinced it was the wrong day to wear a thong to the beach.

Now, what if *sand* were a filter, thought little Johnny, ever thinking of the environment..

Little Jimmy could have sworn they said it was a Sand Hassle Competition

This year, he'd make sure Auntie Ursula couldn't embarrass them with her "And then I walked out of the sea in my undies..." routine

Unfortunately for Auntie Ethel, Harry had managed to drag onto the beach the electric dirll the road-menders had been using

At long last Harry had found a use for all that muesli they kept serving for breakfast at the B&B

At least none of the other well-wishers would be sporting a Union Jack in THAT particular place.

Do I think she'll notice? Hell no, she's playing Angry Birds.

Johnny would do anything to stop his Mum taking him to see the Royal Wedding!

Bury Sand Ed's Mum

She decided to do nothing, and adopt a Sands Bury Ann attitude

Sally was quite comfortable, but was getting a little worried about Uncle Arthur, who she was lying on top of

Poor Mary was a martyr to piles.

The living sandcastle was about to develop Turrets Syndrome

"No Son, I said 'I would like to be in SANDRINGHAM CASTLE' "

Ironically, it was Auntie Sandy who had first told young Max about nominative determinism.

Guantanamo Bay was in fact a lot more fun than the Press suggest

Suddenly, Dad realised he fancied a Sandymum's Port

Harry decided to give his mum the advantage of a Factor 35,000 sunscreen

That man over there told me to cover it up, Mum, as it was driving the donkeys wild

Jimmy had no idea how he did it, but both legs in fact belonged to Uncle Arthur

A young Michael Sheen, about to get cruciified for the first time

Didn't I explicitly tell you, Harry, the sand's OK, but check for crabs first?

Apprentice gravedigger buries mourner by mistake