大象传媒

Every so often, we would be visited by a high ranking officer from the Air Ministry, and he would normally be accompanied by the Officer in charge of the section to be inspected, and on this particular day this was the procedure followed. As the coxswain of the seaplane tender known as the 'Crash boat' I was instructed to come to the pier, to take two officers on an inspection trip from the Pembroke Dock base to Milford Haven.
In due course the officers appeared - Wing Commander Sweet from the Air Ministry, and our own Marine Craft C.O., F/Lt. Merrick. They were both in a good mood as I was given the order to cast off and tour the base. I carefully started to go up and down the lines of both aircraft and marine craft, bearing in mind that when passing moored aircraft, it was vital to slow down to avoid any bow wash which might rock the flying boat being passed. Having covered the area directly in front of the pier head, I began to head up river, passing the line of mooring buoys, some of which were unoccupied. There were two types - the Shorts buoy, the large red 'soft' buoy used mainly by flying boats, or the bigger 'Munro' buoy with a flat top and 'buffer' surround.
On one of the Munro buoys there was a seal, sunning itself and ignoring us completely. It was an attractive brown and white, and I wasn't surprised when one of the officers asked if I could get alongside for them to get a better look at the seal. As I came alongside the buoy, the seal turned on its side and both officers leaned over to study the creature more closely.
What happened next was completely beyond anyone's control.
The seal started to urinate in a most unexpected fashion, sending a great arc of its water up in the air and unfortunately in the direction of our boat. Both officers were shouting for me to go ahead - which I had started to do already - but it was not quickly enough to get the two officers out of range.
I didn't need the order to return to the pier as quickly as possible, and the officers, although accepting that it was not my fault, and even laughing at their joint miscomfiture, were obviously only too glad to get ashore to get cleaned up.
I wondered later if the seal was responding to a call of nature or expressing an opinion...

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