Caption Competition
13:17 UK time, Friday, 12 December 2008
Winning entries in the caption competition.
The competition is now closed.
Here a broker seals a deal during ICAP's annual charity day. This, one can hazard a guess, is not normal office wear at the City firm.
Thanks to all who entered. The prize of a small amount of kudos to the following:
6. RussTarbox
"It's Jeff on the floor... put it all on black."
5. HughMcKinney
Woolies finds a buyer.
4. katiemwhite
The Knave of Hearts desperately tries to explain to the headhunter that he only "borrowed" the tarts to undertake a complex short-selling transaction, and the Queen would have them back before the markets close.
3. Rob Falconer
"Hello, Buckingham Palace Call Centre, how can I help you?"
2. Candace9839
The punishment for selling short was severe.
1. SgtColon
"What am I wearing? Funny you should ask..."
The 
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Comment number 1.
At 11th Dec 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:Yes, we're the knight staff
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Comment number 2.
At 11th Dec 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:Yes, every Friday we have our dressing-up day
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Comment number 3.
At 11th Dec 2008, stigmondo wrote:Alice, it's your mother on the phone..
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Comment number 4.
At 11th Dec 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:Hello, Buckingham Palace Call Centre, how can I help you?
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Comment number 5.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:Play your cards right and you'll be king they said. Yeah, right.
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Comment number 6.
At 11th Dec 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:No, the Queen can't come to the phone - she's making some tarts
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Comment number 7.
At 11th Dec 2008, stigmondo wrote:Clowns to left of me, Jokers to the right.. yes, I work in Investment Banking.
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Comment number 8.
At 11th Dec 2008, rogueslr wrote:Of course your money's safe, trust me, I'm a professional.
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Comment number 9.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:Call centres in India would soon be displaced by those in Wonderland
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Comment number 10.
At 11th Dec 2008, OGNash wrote:Yes, and I'm the Jack of all trades.
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Comment number 11.
At 11th Dec 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:Well, Madam, the fancy-dress shop had run out of vampire costumes
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Comment number 12.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:Yes, Mum, apparently every apprentice had the same idea for a costume.
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Comment number 13.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:I'm tall, dark and handsome and wearing something fun...
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Comment number 14.
At 11th Dec 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:Yeah, you would not believe how little Woolworth's are asking for fancy-dress costumes
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Comment number 15.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:The punishment for selling short was severe
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Comment number 16.
At 11th Dec 2008, stigmondo wrote:Government deny 'dumbing down' at Department of Education..
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Comment number 17.
At 11th Dec 2008, Mersonwastheperson wrote:Yes sir, I am some kind of joker.
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Comment number 18.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:Lunch? We're all going to Burger King.
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Comment number 19.
At 11th Dec 2008, football is a dream, arsenal is reality wrote:Are you having a laugh ?
Is he having a laugh?
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Comment number 20.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:Where Are They Now # 42 : Jimmy Carr, once one of Britain's most popular comedians, now works in an Indian call centre
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Comment number 21.
At 11th Dec 2008, HobbesBobbes wrote:No seriously, stocks and shares are still a good investment.
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Comment number 22.
At 11th Dec 2008, Mersonwastheperson wrote:The Tudor says 'no'.
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Comment number 23.
At 11th Dec 2008, Rich_Griff_2009 wrote:David Walliams in his latest comedy Little Britain role - the investment banker.
Is your money safe? Computer says no....
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Comment number 24.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:Some of these insurance claimants must think we're a pack of jokers
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Comment number 25.
At 11th Dec 2008, OGNash wrote:They told me it was a man's life in the knavey.
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Comment number 26.
At 11th Dec 2008, Mersonwastheperson wrote:"Ooh, you're so much better than the last caller..."
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Comment number 27.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:PT Barnum was right
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Comment number 28.
At 11th Dec 2008, rogueslr wrote:Nowadays, it was better to be thought of as a prat than an investment broker.
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Comment number 29.
At 11th Dec 2008, Mersonwastheperson wrote:"Cabinet office, how may I help?"
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Comment number 30.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:Derek dreaded to think what it would have cost if he'd gone to a private dentist to have the crown fitted
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Comment number 31.
At 11th Dec 2008, stigmondo wrote:Tsk, look at Smithers. Brown suede shoes, and in the City..
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Comment number 32.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:Gamblers Anonymous - how can I help you?
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Comment number 33.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:Can you play White Rabbit by Jefferson Airplane for the brokerage boys?
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Comment number 34.
At 11th Dec 2008, Catherine O wrote:"I'm just looking at my colleague and it's... no jam today, thank you."
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Comment number 35.
At 11th Dec 2008, Kudosless wrote:Carol had saved her favourite outfit for her final appearance on Countdown
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Comment number 36.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:I thought they said my job was going to be "just a broker"
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Comment number 37.
At 11th Dec 2008, TheSBC wrote:The new call centre for 118 118's "free joke" campaign
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Comment number 38.
At 11th Dec 2008, rogueslr wrote:We're through the looking glass, here, people...
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Comment number 39.
At 11th Dec 2008, Marquee wrote:City refute allegations that they're all knaves and charlatans.
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Comment number 40.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:In other news, the Silly Party's clothing budget has come under fire
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Comment number 41.
At 11th Dec 2008, G0ng00zle wrote:Busy no - but I am checking my Spam A Lot!
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Comment number 42.
At 11th Dec 2008, stigmondo wrote:England cricket selectors meet to discuss the team's performance..
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Comment number 43.
At 11th Dec 2008, Kudosless wrote:Brokers misunderstand employer's instruction to pack
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Comment number 44.
At 11th Dec 2008, rogueslr wrote:You say I've won a free cruise from Miami? What sort of fool do you think I am!
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Comment number 45.
At 11th Dec 2008, Marquee wrote:You think I look stupid? You wait until you see what the Queen of Hearts is wearing...
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Comment number 46.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:I'd like to report bullying in the workplace. Just because I have an intestinal problem, they insist on calling me "King o' fHearts."
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Comment number 47.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:The Gaming Commission meetings were never boring
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Comment number 48.
At 11th Dec 2008, Marquee wrote:"Oh you are a card..."
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Comment number 49.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:And after we finish up here, we're off to open up a new casino
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Comment number 50.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:Hello, ´óÏó´«Ã½ Caption Competition Moderator? I'd like to complain about captions 1 through 100 inclusive, as I find them all rather personal.
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Comment number 51.
At 11th Dec 2008, Candace9839 wrote:What was that about a fool and his money?
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Comment number 52.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:A member of the Cabinet hears a rumour that there's going to be a reshuffle
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Comment number 53.
At 11th Dec 2008, Mersonwastheperson wrote:"Yes, I can see Alistair Darling in his counting house, counting all our money."
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Comment number 54.
At 11th Dec 2008, rogueslr wrote:Dave wasn't looking forward to the early evening, semi nude, tournament. It was known as Joust-a-Thong at Twilight.
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Comment number 55.
At 11th Dec 2008, Pat_Patterson wrote:"Coo-ee, yes hello you are through to the not so Dark Knight how can i help you?"
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Comment number 56.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:Especially developed for call centre operatives, K-Tel announce their all-new ear-wax suction-cleaner
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Comment number 57.
At 11th Dec 2008, Jon_M_P wrote:At the interview I thought they said broker..
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Comment number 58.
At 11th Dec 2008, Nzie wrote:Due to the recent economic downturn, Burger King is taking donations.
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Comment number 59.
At 11th Dec 2008, Pat_Patterson wrote:"Higher than a Jack you say.....Oooh you get nothing for a pair...."
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Comment number 60.
At 11th Dec 2008, Marquee wrote:I feel so stupid. They've given me this old-fashioned phone rather than a headset.
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Comment number 61.
At 11th Dec 2008, rogueslr wrote:Somewhere a mother sobbed, as the ´óÏó´«Ã½ reveal to the world her first born works as a broker!
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Comment number 62.
At 11th Dec 2008, Kudosless wrote:Who said the days of City Punches were over?
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Comment number 63.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:Well, I'd look pretty silly offering you a deal like that, wouldn't I?
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Comment number 64.
At 11th Dec 2008, Marquee wrote:Joker broker's phone moan
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Comment number 65.
At 11th Dec 2008, Steele Hawker wrote:When my girlfriend found out what I do for a living - broker heart
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Comment number 66.
At 11th Dec 2008, The_Bob_Glasgow wrote:No, I can assure you madam that we are taking the financial crisis very seriously
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Comment number 67.
At 11th Dec 2008, Sourdust wrote:"It's Her Majesty. She says, 'Off With Our Heads!'..."
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Comment number 68.
At 11th Dec 2008, Gordon Mullan wrote:What am I doing with my other hand? Well, I am a merchant banker...
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Comment number 69.
At 11th Dec 2008, rogueslr wrote:This is the Morris Dancers Chat Line, how can I help you?
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Comment number 70.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:Hello, this is the Wonderland Telephone Museum ...
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Comment number 71.
At 11th Dec 2008, shear_uk wrote:"What am I wearing?? Erm...I'm naked as well darling"
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Comment number 72.
At 11th Dec 2008, jpmurf wrote:I'm glad you like the webcam but no I will not pass you to Matt Lucas
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Comment number 73.
At 11th Dec 2008, spud_the_spider wrote:Jester minute, I'll put you through.
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Comment number 74.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:Hello, Industrial Injuries Helpline? - the Queen chopped off my head and then glued it back on the wrong way
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Comment number 75.
At 11th Dec 2008, jpmurf wrote:Hello, is that "Assassins R Us"? Yes, I like to put a contract out on my boss.....
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Comment number 76.
At 11th Dec 2008, PhilWal0 wrote:"I'll jest be a moment..."
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Comment number 77.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:Derek works for Kodak Prince
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Comment number 78.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:Gordon works for the "Some Day my Prince will Come" sex chat-line
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Comment number 79.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:Derek and his colleagues were all a little hard-of-hearing and had misunderstood when told to report to the office "dressed like bankers"
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Comment number 80.
At 11th Dec 2008, Ruaraidh Gillies wrote:Rupert wished he hadn't complained about the 'hideously striped blazers' that they used to wear.
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Comment number 81.
At 11th Dec 2008, Dougie wrote:Is that the police? I'd like to report a theft of some jam tarts.
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Comment number 82.
At 11th Dec 2008, Dougie wrote:I'll have a million in January jam futures.
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Comment number 83.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:Hello, this is Prince Waterhouse ...
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Comment number 84.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:Hey, guys, we have a complaint - who wants to be King this time?
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Comment number 85.
At 11th Dec 2008, OurSwipe wrote:" Hello Mrs Smith, I'm Delighted To Tell You, You've Won The Lottery "
" You're Joking, Right ? "
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Comment number 86.
At 11th Dec 2008, MuteJoe wrote:"Hello, you're through to the Max Planck Translation Desk, how may I help you?...
...Welsh road signs?... no problem, sir."
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Comment number 87.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:And, when we came back to the changing-rooms after beating Wonderland RFC, all our clothes had been taken ...
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Comment number 88.
At 11th Dec 2008, jimmyog wrote:..........yes, I'm the King of Little Britain. Unfortunately, there's no longer any Great in Britain.
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Comment number 89.
At 11th Dec 2008, OurSwipe wrote:After 25 Years Service, I Came To Work This Morning And They Handed Me My Cards !
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Comment number 90.
At 11th Dec 2008, shear_uk wrote:"I TOLD you I should have gone with the Superman costume...there's at least 4 other jesters here!"
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Comment number 91.
At 11th Dec 2008, spud_the_spider wrote:"Samaritans ... how can I help?"
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Comment number 92.
At 11th Dec 2008, nick_fowler wrote:Marks and Spencer's Chief Menswear Buyer learns he has been sacked
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Comment number 93.
At 11th Dec 2008, Marquee wrote:The realism of the avatars in Playstation Home was incredible, but Sony were criticised for the limited choice of costumes
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Comment number 94.
At 11th Dec 2008, Le Dave wrote:Sir Alan Sugar felt that David Walliams wasn't taking this task in the Celebrity Apprentice all too seriously.
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Comment number 95.
At 11th Dec 2008, rogueslr wrote:This Robert Peston, reporting for The World at One, from the London Stock Exchange.
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Comment number 96.
At 11th Dec 2008, EngineeredSunshine wrote:I assure you sir, I am nobodies fool.
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Comment number 97.
At 11th Dec 2008, shear_uk wrote:Great news!!! Just found out everyone's allowed to wear a jacket and tie on the last day before the Christmas holiday!!
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Comment number 98.
At 11th Dec 2008, OurSwipe wrote:I Was Going To Wear My Arsenal Shirt. But I Was Too Embarassed !
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Comment number 99.
At 11th Dec 2008, penny-farthing wrote:Jack of all Trades................
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Comment number 100.
At 11th Dec 2008, fbxiii wrote:Gordon Brown dons his new Superheros outfit whilst saving the world.
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